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What if I don’t have a MENTOR??

Updated: Oct 16, 2020

“You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” – Jim Rohn

A lot of us have heard this quote before. It basically means that the people you spend the most time with end up influencing your life and decisions the most. Because of this, we obviously want to be very intentional about who those 5 people are! If we surround ourselves with negative people who are always doubting us and our goals…chances are…we’ll start to doubt ourselves and our goals.

But…you may be thinking,

“Yeah…that’s great and all, but if you haven’t noticed, I’ve been quarantined and I can’t be around 5 people even if I wanted to!”

Or maybe you’re thinking,

“I’m at a spot in life right now where I just don’t have 5 people who are truly helping me grow…and I don’t know where to find them…”

We get it. We totally get it. Maybe you have some friends from work who you like to hang out with, but they don’t quite understand why you’d want to do something like start your own business. Maybe the other parents at your kids’ sporting events spend all their time together complaining about current events and work…something you have a hard time seeing the benefit in.

Maybe you feel like you don’t quite fit in with the people naturally placed in your social circle. Or maybe you’ve moved to a new city and know NOBODY. It can take a while to build new relationships – let alone the types of relationships that result in both people GROWING because of it.

So who do you get encouragement from in the meantime? Do you settle for 2 people that are positive influences in your life and let the other 3 be filled with whoever happens to step into them? Or is there a THIRD OPTION?

After all, not all of us can land in a social circle of business and positivity power houses like Gary Vee, Bill Gates, Tim Ferriss, Tom Bilyeu, and Tony Robbins!

Or can we…?!

Davis and I were in this very situation when we decided to pack up and move to Texas. We showed up knowing NOBODY. We had to start from scratch. Yeah, we still had friends back in North Dakota…but they can’t exactly fly down every weekend to have dinner and talk about life.

How the heck were we supposed to gain positive influence if we didn’t have any people around us?? Well, we decided that there is in fact a THIRD OPTION:

Who says these 5 people have to be people that you know? Who says that you need to be able to hangout and go get drinks with these 5 people?

Don’t sacrifice a valuable “spot in your 5” just because you’re in the process of finding someone worth filling it!!

  1. You wish you had more people around you like Tony Robbins?! Cool. Read his books! It’s the wisdom he would impart on you if you knew him.

  2. Wish you had a friend like Gary Vee motivating you to take the first step to start your business?! Awesome. Watch his YouTube videos!

  3. Need somebody that impacts your life in a positive way? For sure! Listen to Tom Bilyeu’s podcast “Impact Theory”.

For the most part we get to CHOOSE who we LET influence us. We don’t have to settle for the people we end up around. Just because you haven’t found 5 actual positive influences in your life doesn’t mean you have to settle while you’re searching for them.

That’s the beauty of today’s technology. At no other time is history have we been able to be so INCLUDED in the lives and mindsets of today’s greatest thinkers. So Davis and I want to share with you some people and resources who have spent time in our 5 over the past year:


  1. Impact Theory with Tom Bilyeu

  2. 5 AM Miracle with Jeff Sanders

  3. How I Built This with Guy Raz

  4. The Ed Mylett Show


  1. 12 Rules for Life, Jordan B. Peterson

  2. Can’t Hurt Me, David Goggins

  3. The E-Myth, Michael Gerber

  4. Switch: How to change things when change is hard, Chip and Dan Heath


  1. GaryVee

  2. Tom Bilyeu

We hope our list helps! It can be hard to find solid people to fill our social circles with, but the resources we have available to us in 2020 can make it so much easier!!

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